Friday, December 29, 2006


The leopard just showed his spots

Such a dissapointing thing to say, attitude to have
She doesn't deserve that

What makes us friends again? I can't seem to remember

Thursday, December 28, 2006


Dear Jann,

I thought we were done, over. I thought I no longer needed your music. That my tastes had changed.

I was wrong... tonight was a Jann night for sure. I was searching for the right music for my mood, had tried multiple bands. Nothing was right and then it hit me, Jann - the album Happy?

Glad to know we still have time together.
Thanks for being here.



It's 1:30 in the morning and I'm so tired my head hurts but I just can't sleep.

Maybe it's the stupid, petty fight I had earlier with a really good friend
Maybe it's the list of things I need to do tomorrow, running through my head
Maybe it's this weird mood I'm in

Sorry if I was weird tonight

Maybe it was the flu that I think has just set in... could be

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Lessons from this Evening

3 things I'm really great at

  1. I make some killer tacos
  2. Losing gracefully
  3. Apparantly I'm lovely to nap with :)

3 things I'm not so great at

  1. I cannot play pool... don't invite me if you're looking for a serious game
  2. Sitting through a movie I do not enjoy... I might as well just go home before I ruin it for others
  3. Saying no to anything after I've been called Darling, Dear or Sweetheart


Monday, December 25, 2006

When My Hands Get Cold

So if you know me at all it's no secret that I love to hold hands. Irena will vouch for me.

I've been thinking about it a lot lately... what is it about simple hand holding that's so enjoyable?


At least I can say that in the last little while I've been much more responsible with my hand holding. It's been a long time since I've caused drama for myself...

Monday, December 18, 2006

Christmas Time is Here

When I was about 15 or 16 my Mom found these Christmas sheets for our beds. She bought 2 sets, one for me and one for MIchelle. She made our beds and hung mini lights above the beds so when we came home there was this glow and fresh turned down beds with the sheets showing. There have been other friends over the years that Mom has suprised with this little treat. This has become something of a tradition. Every year on or around the first of December we'd put the sheets on our bed, sometimes we'd put up the lights, sometimes we wouldn't. Michelle and I moved away from home and made sure we took our sheets, every year we'd continue to put the sheets on. Not only a Christmas tradition but however cheesey you may think it, it's also a bit of a bonding thing... Michelle and I knew that both of us were sharing in our sheets, even though we don't live close anymore.

So last year I got this fantastic new bed, it really is the best bed ever. Let me explain the beauty of it... The magic starts with the upgrade from the regular twin to a grown up queen. Pillow top on the top and bottom. I have a heated mattress pad that goes underneath the sheets, no more cold feet. Then I have these really nice chocolate brown sheets, a quilt from Grandma (Grandma quits really are the best) and then to top it all off a lovely feather duvet with a pretty cover. I sacrifice a lot of space for the bed and it wouldn't fit down the stairs so it had to come in the window but all this is worth it. The only real downside of this bed is that I no longer have Christmas sheets that fit. Last year I just did without and figured it didn't really matter. I was fully prepared to do the same this year but in Michelle's blog she mentioned her sheets... Michelle got married so she also upgraded and doesn't have sheets anymore either but she at least has pillow cases. Her blog made me realize just how much I miss my sheets... I know this sounds stupid but they are the beginning of Christmas for me.

So last year I felt a little scrooge-ish, I had a really hard time getting into the spirit of things. That's unusual for me, I normally really love Christmas. This year I'd been making more of an effort, I've been listening to Christmas music and trying but something was lacking. I've been putting off buying presents and I'm not even putting up a tree. I haven't taken any goodies to my neighbors yet and I feel this overall stress.

Yesterday was our Institute Choir Christmas performance... my Mom really loves our director and our choir so Mom, Dad and Grandma came up to listen to me sing, and play the handbell (insert handbell arm motion here).

They got to my house at 4:30 ish, I'd made them dinner so we ate but I had to leave at 5 to practice so I left my parents at my house, they came to the church at 7:00. The performance went well, I played my bell (insert handbell arm motion here), did the usual visiting and went home. I was heading downstairs to change and there was a light on in my room... I was surprised I'd left my lamp on cause it's not very like me. I decend the stairs, face my room... and freeze! All I could do was stare, open mouth. While I was gone my Mom had made and turned down my bed with brand new flannely Christmas sheets (they have snowmen on them). The glow wasn't my lamp but mini lights hung above my bed! So she's pretty much the best mom ever :)

So I slept in my super cozy sheets last night and for the first time in 2 years it really feels like Christmas. Apparantly the sheets were vital to my Christmas spirit. I'm looking forward to making goodies for my neighbors (I'm still not setting up the tree though). I feel like I'm really ready. It very much felt before like I hadn't done something I was supposed to do so nothing else was in the right order. Well the order is right and now I'm ready for Christmas, bring it on!

Christmas time is here
Happiness and cheer
Fun for all that children call
Their favorite time of the year
Snowflakes in the air
Carols everywhere
Olden times and ancient rhymes
Of love and dreams to share
Sleigh bells in the air
Beauty everywhere
Yuletide by the fireside
And joyful memories there
Christmas time is here
We'll be drawing near
Oh, that we could always see
Such spirit through the year
Oh, that we could always see
Such spirit through the year...

Saturday, December 16, 2006

If you had a superpower what would it be?

So I love this show called Heroes... "Ordinary People Discovering Extraordinary Abilities"

In the last episode there was this girl who remembered everything she heard, read or saw. If I could pick a super power I think that'd be it. You'd never forget anything, you could od anything you wanted because you'd know everything.

What would you pick?

Friday, December 15, 2006

Manly man

"You lock your doors at night?"

"It's a house of 4 girls, of course we do."

"but you live next to 4 boys"

So if someone were to come in at night (not break in cause the doors were open), then I can expect him to wake up and come save the day?

I appreciate his confidance in himself and his manly protector attitude but I'll stick with the locked doors :)

Sunday, December 10, 2006

A Song to Change your Life

So I've been thinking about his concept for a while now...

You know that song, that one that you hear that changes the way you feel? There's something about it that hits you in a way to change everything, or so it seems (I should have prefaced this by saying it's possible I can be a little over dramatic sometimes).

It might be the lyrics that hit you just so, they describe you at that moment better than anything else can or it's something about how right the chords are, how perfect the harmony is.

Weeks, or months down the line sometimes they've lost their magic... they're just another song but sometimes they'll be special forever.

There are a bunch of those songs for me right now...

Pompeii - Numbers
Something Corporate - Konstantine
Making April - Hurry Up and Wait
Vega 4 - Life is Beautiful
Mike Doughty - I Hear the Bells
Pompeii - States

So my thought is... how many other songs like these ones are out there waiting for me to find them? What if I miss them? What if I never find them? These songs affect me when I find them so not finding them must affect me too... In what way?

It worries me